In a Mood

It’s never fun to get kicked out of the club. I got kicked out this week.

In order to stay on the study for Crohn’s Disease, I had to have a significant change in my numbers since the last injection of medication. I didn’t get it. Even though there was a 40 point change, it requires a change of 100 points or more to stay in the study. So I’m out of the club.

I was expecting it, because I’d been keeping my pain level journal and I knew the numbers wouldn’t add up right. Being dropped off the study wasn’t nearly as discouraging as the limited amount of options remaining for me in dealing with this beastly disease. So I allowed a mood of discouragement and just plain, “I don’t care” to take over for a couple of days. But I discovered something: it’s not fun to live like that.

I’ve had a couple of days of getting myself back together slowly and now it’s back to the drawing board. God has gotten me through so many bad times of Crohn’s and He will get me through this one as well.

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