When you are used to being active and involved in everything, being sidelined is almost a fate worse than death. So you can imagine my anticipation and eagerness after a corrective surgery to get back on my feet and get back in the game. Oops, a little too soon and a little too fast.
The good news is that the evil adhesion mass has been removed and once I fully recover from the surgery, look out world here I come! I’ve longed to do so much that my hunger and thirst for it drove me harder, faster, more – and just a little bit of overdoing it.
There are things I’ve promised myself – no more sitting around and doing nothing! Getting out and doing things again and saying yes to more invitations. But I’ve come to realize that being sidelined has an impact on more than your physical ability. It creates new habits, new routines, new ways of doing things. I’ve already faced a couple of situations where activity was available, but the habit of staying home and drawing into myself reared its ugly head and sometimes won out.
The biggest battle I face now may no longer be physical pain, but the kind of life I accepted while I was in so much pain and whether or not to continue coasting along. God give me strength to no longer find coasting along as acceptable!
I love it when you do that, it’s so cute.
I’m not cute!
Karl and I had this argument many times in college during our dating years. To me, cute means it made me go mushy – completely unable to resist. Karl would accept any other words, but not cute. He did not give me a reasonable explanation other than “guys aren’t cute.” So I learned to avoid using that word, even though I never understood why.
Flash forward 22 years and my 12-year-old son is able to put into words that make sense why this evil label of “cute” is so demeaning to a man. Matthew explained that cute is usually something that is helpless, like a newborn kitten. It is so adorably cute because of how much care it needs (just saying that sometimes men do behave like they need a lot of care). His tween wisdom was given, full of passion and determination, more than his father, to never be called cute.
Dealing with two generations of Leukert men, I finally understand why the word is so offensive to masculinity. While it is still true that women don’t limit the word “cute” to the helpless and needs care definition that men do; I will refrain from using that word to describe in any way the men in my family. I respect them enough to appreciate their definition of the word and use it appropriately around them.
Today, I’m grateful to finally have the mystery solved. To finally know “why” the word is so offensive and to make sure my words always express to my husband that he is “the man” in our house!