Everything has to be done in a certain way and there is always only one way to do it that is right. Getting the job done isn’t important. Getting all the details perfect first and doing it right (even if it’s late) is of most importance. Yes, my oldest son resides in Perfect Country. I, on the other hand, reside equally in Fun and Control countries. This really messes with Michael’s favorite vacation spot – Peace Country. I wouldn’t know much about it as I rarely visit there.
So what happens when I need something done a particular way? I humbly admit that I will get it done. That’s what control country residents do, but it may not be as precise as the job requires. I don’t ask my daughter to do it. She lives in Fun and Control countries as well. The request is made to Michael. Here, perfect country, please cut this into many pieces all exactly the same size with no crumbs. And he gets the job done, precisely.
Learning where our kids function best, what countries they are from, has helped us tremendously in knowing how to connect with them and knowing how to draw out their strengths. It seems a far more regular occurrence for parents (and teachers) to expect all children to behave in a certain way and move around in our world in only that one way. What a blessing we miss when we fail to see who they really are. What a blessing we miss in being able to focus them on their strengths and applaud them for a job well done!
Take the time to study your children. If you need some help, visit the Flag Page website where you will find more about the four countries: Fun, Control, Perfect and Peace. You can find it at http://www.flagpagetest.com.
It’s never fun to get kicked out of the club. I got kicked out this week.
In order to stay on the study for Crohn’s Disease, I had to have a significant change in my numbers since the last injection of medication. I didn’t get it. Even though there was a 40 point change, it requires a change of 100 points or more to stay in the study. So I’m out of the club.
I was expecting it, because I’d been keeping my pain level journal and I knew the numbers wouldn’t add up right. Being dropped off the study wasn’t nearly as discouraging as the limited amount of options remaining for me in dealing with this beastly disease. So I allowed a mood of discouragement and just plain, “I don’t care” to take over for a couple of days. But I discovered something: it’s not fun to live like that.
I’ve had a couple of days of getting myself back together slowly and now it’s back to the drawing board. God has gotten me through so many bad times of Crohn’s and He will get me through this one as well.
As I saw it unfold before me I could only shake my head and say, “Cramming.” If it wasn’t so frustrating it would be funny. We don’t always methodically prepare and study for something until we have a greater sense of urgency, leading to desperate and intense periods of exhaustive study of material – otherwise known as cramming. Alas, each generation has to learn it for themselves.
Matthew and his fellow pathfinders did a trial run yesterday, preparing for this coming weekend’s “Pathfinder Bible Experience.” They have been given selected passages from the Bible that the questions will be taken from. Their wise leader divided the passages up among the pathfinders so they would only have to concentrate on certain parts and be well prepared to answer questions from those passages. The pathfinders, having these assignments for months, demonstrated quite well that they prefer the cramming method of preparation.
Karl had a talk with Matthew this morning about how his knowledge of the assigned passages has increased as the sense of urgency has increased. I believe for many of us, that’s half of the battle – understanding the sense of urgency months out, so we don’t end up cramming at the end. I battle with this myself. I’m a lot more concerned about keeping my boss’ insurance in compliance as the deadline for renewal draws closer. I’m a lot more focused on my presentations to the women’s groups as the day of the seminar gets closer.
As always, God comes in and turns everything upside down. He doesn’t require any cramming. We don’t have to be perfect, well versed or in compliance before we come to Him. We just have to come. It is so simple, yet many still put this life changing decision off, because they feel no sense of urgency. They plan to live their life and then make things right with God just before they die of a nice old age. You don’t have to be perfect, just come. After all, you don’t know when your last day is. No cramming, just come.